in laws make me want to run away

My in laws have always been abusive, controlling and overbearing to their adopted son but it got so much worse the first time he told them “no” 6 years ago when he was 20. They blamed his disobedience on me (his gf) and started acting more erratic and cruel towards us while trying to force him to move back in with them and work the job they wanted and be a care aid for him mom. They told him for 6 years constantly that his disobedience was killing his mom and ruining her health while she refused to see doctors of manage her health because he wouldn’t move back in with them. He’s gone back every time she shad a health scare for 6 years (and had to lose jobs, ect due to the time needing to take off) but has refused to move back home except this time because he tried to go back to college after her health seemed to be doing better for a while.

She has been getting more sick recently after her husband kept convincing her to not trust her doctors and take ivermectin for her cancer. She also recently found out he was cheating on her with sex workers (and sending money to ai girls) that were our age.

Well she and her husband checked her out of the hospital on Tuesday and yesterday she has to be taken back and needs an emergency surgery but because of how little heart function she has there’s a chance They don’t tell him with enough time to realistically travel there before visiting hours closed and so he chose to try to have a long phone call with her before surgery. She ignored him for the two hours he was on the phone and when he said “I love you” she said “no you don’t”

Then.. we find out the surgery isn’t at 6am like we were told. It’s for 10 or 11, which meant he could have arrived before visiting hours.

I’ve told him I would support him going in any way I can (packing luggage, organizing tickets, driving him 2hrs to the airport), but he is so tired of their treatment of him and how they never expect the same level of blind obedience from their older biological children. He has been expected to not have his own life and to drop the life he did build while his older, RETIRED sibling who recently rekindled a connection with their mom has had no pressure to uproot her life to care for their mother. They just fixate on him because he’s the only child who didn’t go no contact as soon as they turned 18.

I cannot imagine treating my child how they treat their son.