Avocado Toast with some bacon and egg 😋 

I can‘t seem to get over the most basic things. Just a quick backstory. I met this girl 8 weeks ago over some Instagram mutuals. She seemed interested in me and wanted to meet. I went in pretty unsure but decided to meet her and it was a great decision. We hit it off, we met at 5PM and walked around, drank, played pool and just talked shit until half past midnight. I really grew to like her, her sarcasm and wit and yeah.

Quick thing is I was 19 then and she‘s 18. She told me about her past relationships and how she got ghosted a month before meeting me and then she told me „I went in not wanting to like you and now I sadly do“. Which I found odd but glossed over. At the end she kissed me which was actually my first kiss and she knew that beforehand.

Well after this she asked for my number to set up the next date but it never got so far, she suddenly realized she wasn‘t interested in anything and was sorry for „giving me that impression“. I just said okay, take it easy then. Since then she‘s snapped me on my birthday and kept snapping me afterwards (we just sent selfies back and forth) and I took that as a queue to ask her out again. She said she‘d like to meet and suggested a date. 

And then I got stood up. She apologized profusely over call and said she had forgotten and I said I‘d wait if she still wanted to come but if not we didn‘t need to reschedule. She said it‘d take an hour AND that she meant this platonically. I said I didn‘t, wished her good luck and removed her from my socials. 

Now it‘s been 2 weeks since that and I still think about her. She wasn‘t the most beautiful girl, she was rough around the edges but I just wish I could have met the girl I met on the date again. And I feel really weak for not getting over something so basic. I feel super naive and kind of like a child. I am happy with myself, my appearance, I work out and sleep well and eat and study and it isn‘t an obsession or anything but I still feel that slight heartache once or twice a day.

Tldr: Went on one beautiful date with a girl, she was my first kiss and then nothing came of it and I feel silly for not getting over that.

Can‘t get over most basic thing