hi #1

I hate that I miss you. I hate that I am trying to make you jealous so you want me back. I hate that I wanna ask you if you and Riley like your new place, because you haven’t asked about the cats at one time and they miss you. Athena and I are doing OK. I hate that my heart still wants you and that everybody thinks that you’re a piece of shit. I hate that you asked me to marry you and then became avoidant. I hate when you walked out the door you told me things changed, but you never could. I hate that I hate you and I love you. My heart and mind want two different things, but I know leaving you is the right choice. If you showed back up on my doorstep and told me everything would be different. I’d run away with you in a heartbeat. Life is confusing and sadly getting over you won’t be the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Part of me still wants to believe that you do love me, but you’re just a scared. But do I really want someone who’s scared to do anything in life without being pushed off the edge? You’re confusing, heck you confused me for four years. I hope all the girls you watch on twitch, and all the bitches you follow that are half naked are getting you through this break up. I bet your hands getting to work out, just like my heart lol.