Why did it take so long?

I always knew something bad happened multiple times in 6th and 7th grade. I never really thought about it because I thought I was always just a screw up. Sabotaged jobs, sabotaged relationships when I felt as little as a romantic attraction to them and since I was 13 I’ve always needed an addiction whether it be Baja Blast, Cigarettes, pills or dope. I’ve never had sex not because nobody has ever shown interest in me but because I’m afraid to.

Ever since being clean since early April of this year my mind started pushing me to wonder why I forgot an entire of my year inside and outside of school and then I had the first flashback, then the second, then the third. They were all in third person with extreme emotions attached. I know the abuse was verbal and emotional and at least some physical. But I’m also getting sexual which I think HAS to be a false flashback or maybe I’m just in denial. The worst of the abuse was done by two classmates who I remembered finding as small time bullies at the beginning of 6th grade and when my memories began to come back in 8th grade I was extremely nervous around them and didn’t want to be alone with them. But I remember I wanted to be there friend at the same time which never made sense to me considering the known circumstances and that they were know to abuse other students as well albeit only physically and verbally. I know I don’t want to open Pandora’s box but I just really wanna know why it’s taken so long for me to even remember? I have two friends who have cptsd and their memories began flashing back to them in their early teens and late teens.