Feeling anxious about taking Alprazolam (night vs daytime + fear of panic/paradoxical reaction)

Hey everyone,

I’m dealing with pretty strong anxiety and I’ve been prescribed alprazolam as a sort of emergency medication.

I actually had good experiences with it in the past ,it helped calm me down and I didn’t have any bad reactions. But lately I’ve been struggling with a lot of anticipatory anxiety about taking it again.

My main fear is that instead of calming me down, it could somehow make my panic worse or make me feel out of control (like fainting or completely losing control). I know paradoxical reactions exist but I’ve read they’re quite rare, yet my brain keeps fixating on it.

I also think a lot of what I’m feeling might be expectation anxiety. Just thinking about taking it already makes me feel more panicky and hyperaware of every body sensation, so I can’t really tell what is actual side effect fear and what is just my anxiety spiraling before I even take anything.

I’m also unsure about timing: would it be better to take it at night while gaming/distraction (like playing on my PC), or during the day when I’m more alert and can better observe how I feel? Nighttime feels more comfortable, but I’m worried I might overthink things more in that setting.

Has anyone dealt with similar fear of taking benzos after good past experiences? Or this kind of anxiety about losing control / timing it wrong?

Would really appreciate hearing how others handle this mental loop.