Mental and s*xual abuse - what do I do hereonwards?

NSFWGeneral

Please excuse my language. I am extremely jittery and do not have the bandwidth to polish and structure this post.

I am a 21 year old woman who dated a 24 or 25 (he explicitly told me that his age on his government documents is forged) man off of Bumble from mid January to mid April. He would usually body shame me, keep track of how many grams of protein I would consume in a day, comment on my arms when they've lost their pump, shame me for eating too many carbs, ask me to get my hormones checked because there is hair on my nose, critique the shape of my nose, urge than I need to recompose my body and be 10 kilograms lighter, etc. - the usual body shaming. He has also joked about murdering me if I leave him and creating AI slop of us and pasting it around my campus.

He had a weird obsession with the themes of impregnation, swallowing, conceiving, ownership and subjugation. My first kiss with him was against my consent, and he deemed that it would be appropriate to kiss me as I was lying down and "implicitly" asking for it. He has spat inside my mouth and slapped me in bed to experiment what I would or wouldn't be into without a prior verbal discussion preceeding the same. He would constantly complain about the fact that I don't let him finish inside me despite wearing a condom. I am particularly sensitive about my back being touched, and he would get angry as to why I would flinch despite knowing that it is his touch.

If I was tired, he'd chalk it down to me giving him head for too long. If I looked nice, it would be because his DNA is "flowing inside me". He once said that I am a vessel of his "bengali seed". When he'd calculate my protein intake for the day, he'd add 2 grams for when I'd give him head. He explicitly didn't let me spit, and would state that "women who love their partner don't swallow". He has urged me to continue giving him head despite me having a panic attack, despite me not having the physical and mental bandwidth to continue and despite me being tired. Once, when we were fighting, he went mute on me and said we would only explain his side of things if I were to sleep besides him naked. In that moment, I didn't want to do so but was forced into complying.

There was also an emphasis on the fact that he has never fucked a woman of my religious background before, and that my genetics need to be preserved, and when he'd compliment he wouldn't describe my physical appearance - rather compliment my genetic make up and say that he wants me to have his kids ASAP. Aditionally, when I was tipsy he kept convincing me about how I'll change my mind about having kids and how he wants two.

On 03.04.26, the condom broke and he insisted that he pulled out in time and that he's only getting me plan B because I'm a paranoid person. I have had to explain to a grown man that the pull out method for sex isn't reliable. On 28.04.26, I went through with a medicated abortion alone in my hostel room, 1800 kilometers away from home.

I left this bastard around a month ago. Where do I put all this rage and grief? What can I do for him to bear repercussions? He knows where my campus is. I left him about a month ago, and I also deleted our chats in a fit of grief and rage but do have screenshots as evidence.

Posted May 1, 2026, 9:17 PM UTC

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