People keep assuming I’m naive or clueless, and it’s starting to get to me

(25 yo, F)

I’ve been noticing a pattern where people, even friends, seem to perceive me as naive or not very aware. It’s rarely said directly but it shows up in small interactions, and it’s starting to bother me.

For example, I was talking to someone about how I bathe my newborn. I started explaining that I use a baby bath and put some water in, and before I could even finish my sentence, she interrupted me, clearly worried, and said something like:

“Wait, you just put the baby in the water??”

It was so surprising to me because she genuinely thought I was capable of doing something unsafe ( basically waterboarding my bb) like I didn’t know what I was doing simply because i did it in a different way. I corrected her, but what stayed with me was that this was her first assumption, she really thinks I’m THAT clueless.

Another situation: a friend introduced me to a man, and later I told her I wasn’t physically attracted to him. I tried to explain that even if someone has good qualities, if you’re not personally attracted to them, it’s a very dangerous gamble, especially when it comes to intimacy in a relationship.

At one point I even tried to make a light joke to explain my point, like: “love is great, but when it comes to making babies, you can’t just look at each other from a distance.”

It's not rocket science.

Instead of understanding, ( she's in a committed relationship, she of all people shouldn't be surprised by what i said ) she was shocked, upset and kind of disgusted that I'd present it that way. And then she kept insisting that I was putting looks over personality or that I was “looking for a model,” which is not what I was saying at all.

To me, it felt like she completely missed the point and reduced what I said to something much more superficial.

I later confronted her about it and said it feels like she sees me as stupid or that i don’t consider personality, when in reality I just think attraction is very subjective and personal. She got mad and said:“you know what I’m never giving you advice again in that case.”

I ended up apologizing cuz she was 1 of my only 2 friends and I love her.

I tend to explain things step by step instead of jumping straight to the conclusion. But I don’t think I’m that naive or unaware. I just feel like I’m being perceived that way.