20yrs all for nothing

I hate how my soon to be ex likes to play the victim and say how toxic and unempathic I was throughout our marriage.

Meanwhile she was the one who had an affair (2024) and gaslit me for an entire year even while we were having couples therapy. I had to finnaly get my answer about the affair from the affair partner. I was ready to drop say my suspicions after a year. However, after catching her sexting another person, all my suspicions came back and I decided to ask the affair partner who did indeed confirm the affair (2025).

After the affair was discovered, she was saying how she wanted to work trying to save the marriage. I decided to at least try since we've been together for 19yrs.

Fast forward a year later after the affair discovery (2026) we had a discussion on the marriage and she was leaning on the fence. Two weeks later, after seeing the she was liking divorce post, I asked her again and she said yes because she is now gay.

Even now, before the papers are officially served she already started to flirt online publicly where I am able to see on her Instagram likes. She isn't aware that I've seen the reels or if she is aware then she just don't care.

But yet I was the toxic and unempathic one in the relationship in her eyes and according to her she didn't feel loved by me.