Impossible to escape burnout as a parent

I am so deep in burnout and I don't see a way out. My husband does everything for the kids and me. All the childcare, all the household.

I wake up and I start crying because I know my children would love to see me, it's to much pressure. Everything is to much, I don't want to be perceived. I don't see a way to gain functionality again, it's years and it's getting worse and worse. I don't have a way out.

I am already getting psychiatric and psychological help, before anyone asks. But it doesn't help, it makes everything worse. Having to get out and talking makes everything so much worse, every doctors appointement is just more demands and more stuff I have to do.

I don't know why I am writing this. There wont be any help, I already get as much help as possible and it's not working.

I didn't know I was autistic before becoming a mother. My kids deserve better, I am either shutting down or having a meltdown. I don't think there is a way for me to escape this burnout.