Różnice kulturowe czy coś więcej? Moje doświadczenie w RPA

Hey, I need your opinion because I'm a bit unsure what to think about this. I'm Polish, 30 years old, and my fiancé is 10 years older than me, just for reference. We met in the UK, and we both work in healthcare. My fiancé is from RPA, he's Afrikaner, and I recently flew there to meet his family. And honestly... I'm shocked. Aside from the huge social differences (which are difficult for me to accept in themselves), what struck me most was the attitude toward people working from home. They call them "servants," and that sounds very strange and disrespectful to me. The most awkward situation was at dinner. There were people standing next to us whose job was to literally serve everything. When I tried to get water, one person immediately tried to pour it for me. I said I'd pour it myself, after all, I have two hands. It became very awkward, as if I'd offended someone. From what I've seen, it's normal for such people to serve everything, even to their grandchildren. To me, this is unthinkable in the 21st century, and it makes me very uncomfortable. Is this actually "normal," or am I overreacting? My fiancé says he was raised that way and is used to it... shocking.