How did you accept that you can’t do everything alone?

Hi everyone,

I was recently diagnosed with autism and ADHD, and I feel like my life has fallen apart. For contact I’m 25 years Old.

I’m a student, but been failing classes for 3 years straight. This goes far beyond school. I feel like I’ve completely lost my footing. I’m struggling with basic daily functioning, structure, and taking care of myself. Even small things feel overwhelming.

I also don’t really have a support system — no close friends or family I can rely on — and the loneliness makes everything feel heavier. I moved to a bigger city at 22 thinking I was ready to leave behind my toxic family and udbringing.

Lately, I’ve been hit with this realization:

I don’t think I can handle things on my own anymore.

I have a lot of different challenges at once:

• Very limited social life and isolation

• Difficulty leaving the house and being active

• Struggling to build and maintain routines

• Financial stress and unstable living situation. My student apartment is absolutely insane cost and I feel like I have to get out of it.

• A difficult upbringing and family issues that I’m only now ready to face (it feels very complex and overwhelming, like there’s a lot to “unpack”).

I feel like right now what is on my mind a lot is all of the unpack trauma I carried with me. I haven’t been able to actually sit down and breathe.

My family issues runs so deep that it‘s literally blocking me at every point in my life: my social life, my school life, my finances. I feel like I Have to unpack this but I have to do it the right way. I have a shit ton of baggage and it would probably take at least 6 months to one year to unpack.

It feels like too many problems at once, and I don’t even know where to start or if it’s even possible to fix any of it.

I am technically connected to public support, but the waiting times are long. An example is a started my adhd/autism diagnosis in may last year. I still don’t have access to medication. And my times for my social workers haven’t even been registered.… the public system in Europe sucks (Denmark).

and I don’t feel like I can just wait. I’m open to getting help (even paying for therapy!!)

Another problem:

I struggle with letting people in — both emotionally, but also in a very practical sense. My living space has gotten quite messy, and the idea of someone seeing how I actually live, or helping me with basic things, makes me feel very exposed and uncomfortable. But I need to get over this because I cannot keep living like this. I don’t have a family to come and support me.

That’s probably the hardest part for me.

So I wanted to ask:

• How did you come to terms with not being able to manage everything on your own?
• How did you start opening up to help, when it felt uncomfortable or even impossible?

I think part of me still resists it, even though I know I need it.

If anyone has been in a similar place, I would really appreciate hearing your experience.

Thank you for reading.