Maybe I’m overthinking but I’m hurt.. think piece but comments are welcomed

I’m hurt I won’t lie

Sometimes I sit here and think about things that have occurred in my life relationship wise and what they’re teaching me but I always end up with hurt.

These feelings started coming up more frequently after ending a relationship and reflecting.. my more previous relationship was a rocky road with neither of us being healthy for each other towards the end. There were lies, deception, infidelity and more. I decided to walk away because I didn’t want to hurt anymore. 2 years later, he’s married and it hurts seeing someone live the life you wanted (or thought you wanted). My most recent relationship… I ended for the same reason of being hurt. There was also deception but it was more of an emotional maturity thing.

Both times I’ve been hurt and I feel like I’m getting the shit end of the stick. I’ve been so loving and accepting to end up hurt, cheated on and so much more. It makes me think “is it even worth it or am I just happier being alone?” But sometimes I sit there and I’m like “it hurts seeing people that hurt you so much love such a happy life, no consequences to their actions or nothing… is it my karma? Did I do something wrong?”

I know this feeling will resonate with some people but idk, I’m open to coping skills or anything to help. Yes I’ve been going to therapy and understand the emotion is there for me to work through, it just hurts when I’m usually the one always hurt in the end