I 32 F in a relationship for 5 years with 54 M separated (still married but with talks on annulment) is this going somewhere?

I 32 F in a relationship for 5 years with 54 M separated (still married but with talks on annulment already). Before we start this relationship, i was clear that i want to be married and build my own family. However, time passes, different reasonings like problem with kids, financial priorities, age, etc came up. We recently planned to buy our own house (currently living together in a small apartment). Apparently, new reasonings like better to invest the money to others first then buy the house in cash after earning from it etc. so here comes another 1 year without any sign of buying it. The relationship is almost perfect, loving, caring, trusting. I was torn between choosing to be happy now or pursuing what i really want with other person probably but will surely hurt me now. It’s getting me anxious. Like of course if i end this, i don’t even have a guarantee if i will be meeting the person who will give me what i want. Otherwise i will just resent myself by letting him go. Am i being insane?