Am I unlucky with love? What do I do next?

I haven’t dated in a long time. I met my ex during my undergrad, I was 19, he was 21. We dated on and off for 2 years but I always knew it would end eventually, especially when I get the courage to leave. I broke up with my ex in March/ April 2024 and then hooked up with him November 2025 during a “catch up”. After our relationship I started to see more flaws in men and felt like I couldn’t find my type. After the breakup I moved locations for postgrad medicine. I experienced a lot of family issues after the breakup, and eventually failed my first year of medicine. During my retake year I eventually reached out to my ex because I was tired of handling everything alone. When we hooked up the next day I felt stupid as I quickly found out he had a new “situationship” and he didn’t really help with the stress I was experiencing. Fast forward a few months I caught up with a guy I had briefly spoken to in the past, he enjoyed my company but didn’t want a relationship. 2026 came, aced all my January exams and had completed different extracurricular. I felt ready to date, the organic method wasn’t working so I reinstalled hinge (something I tried during my breaks with my ex). I didn’t really like my matches so would barely engage in conversation. Eventually I found out one of the guys was from the same ethnic background, this intrigued me. He was temporarily in the city next to me for work but was based in America. On paper he was great, we moved our conversation to Instagram and then he ghosted me. I was so hurt. I deleted the app and put my heads back into my books. He would watch all my posts but not message me. Then 3 months later he messaged me, during the school holidays, I was interested in his excuse, but when I eventually found out, it didn’t make sense, but he mentioned taking me out. I then decided I would go for the experience as it would be a good exam destress and he would be leaving so it wouldn’t go anywhere. He then asked for my number and we started having phone calls, I then started to doubt my original plan, I really looked forward to these calls. I eventually came back and was excited to meet him. We initially had a date the next day but I said he should come over on my arrival day and we still go for the date the next day. I think I trusted him. He came over and we went for a walk, he kept mentioning he wasn’t dressed for a walk but I said he could not go to my room. On our walk we made out but I enjoyed it. I noticed a few red flags in him but reminded myself that this wouldn’t lead to a relationship so did not matter. Eg he didn’t walk me home and he only offered to sort out my bus ride when I mentioned it but he never actually did and I ended up walking home by myself in the cold and dark (he was lost so I walked him to the station). The next day is my first day back to class and when I’m done I go home and accidentally fall asleep, I wake up at 1:30am, I expected him to have called me or asked why I didn’t attend the date but to my surprise he hadn’t message me. I was so confused but thought there must have been a reason. Fast forward, we spoke about it and he thought I had stood him up and wasn’t interested. I forgave him. We would have phone calls where he was tell me about America, I always felt odd because he would never compliment me or anything I achieved. Things got worse when I realised he would only talk to me super late at night, he said it was due to finish work late. Then one day my friend teased me about how he had never taken me out, and I realised after that missed date he had not planned anything. We had gone to each others places after work or studying to cuddle + foreplay, but he had not actually taken me on dates. I mentioned it to him and he said it was bc I was always busy on weekends, so I intentionally made myself free on bank holiday weekend and said he should plan something, he did not. I decided I would not over think about would force myself to spend bank holiday weekend with him and see if he is as busy as he says he is, when I went there he really was. But I noticed that our conversations were better on calls and he barely spoke to me in person. He told me it was bc he was working but I didn’t know what was a lie or the truth. I went home and felt like I could trust him, but part of my spirit said I couldn’t. We had previously spoken about hinge in the past and he said he was still on there bc he had many apps on his phone and little time to remove it. I decided to try find his page, Ofc it was there, but was surprised me was the fact every time I checked it said “active today”, something odd for an app you forgot to delete. One day we had a lovely phone convo and my flatmate joined us. He then said he will schedule in to come visit me and my flatmate so we can do some painting. He then ghosted me that whole day. He then said he would come spend a Saturday with me to make it up with me and he said he would come at 7pm, I said if he could come earlier it would be better, he said he would be working, I said ok. He then turned up at 10:30pm. I calmly explained how he annoyed me and how it felt like he didn’t care. He said he was sorry. I then started crying and he watched me cry and said “i want to hug you”, but didn’t move an inch.
Being around him I used to make excuses like “he’s social awkward, he hasn’t got bad intentions”. I asked him if he was talking to anyone else and he said no.

The real question- I feel like I’ve given up on love multiple times in life, and perhaps given up on finding the man I actually want and keep settling for these men I don’t trust or even know where we stand.
My ex stopped complimenting me 1 year into our relationship and I could tell resented me. The new guy only complimented me on hinge. Both guys made me feel constantly on edge and even question myself since this kept happening to me. I am 23 years old and I feel like I’ve been unlucky with love for a long time. I really really don’t know what to do.