Feeling hopeless after second egg retrieval — low embryo numbers again

I’m feeling so hopeless right now.

About a week and a half ago, I had my second egg retrieval, this time at a different clinic. I really wanted to feel hopeful because I thought maybe a new clinic would mean a better outcome.

My first IVF cycle results were:

39 eggs retrieved
3 embryos total
Grades: 3BB, 2BB, 2BC

None resulted in pregnancy. I think the first transfer may have been a chemical, but I’m unsure about the other two. My experience with that clinic was also really hard emotionally. They basically just said, “Sorry to report you aren’t pregnant,” and that was it.

For my second retrieval, I was feeling more hopeful at first:

25 eggs retrieved
21 mature
14 fertilized
2 embryos total

On day 5, I was told we had two embryos graded 3BB and 2BB. I didn’t receive a day 6 or day 7 call, so I called on day 8 and found out all the others had arrested. Final outcome was 2 embryos.

I know people say “all you need is one,” and I’m really trying to hold onto that. I’m hoping so badly that one of these embryos takes.

But after 3 failed transfers and now another retrieval that didn’t go as well as I hoped, I’m feeling really sad and defeated. It’s hard not to wonder what’s wrong or why my numbers drop so much from eggs retrieved to embryos.

Has anyone else had a high number of eggs retrieved but ended up with only a few embryos — and still had success? I could really use some hope or similar stories right now.