Guy’s I can’t stop spiraling because after taking full accountability, she went back to her line “I just need you to also know that this was the start of our relationship. Before I actually let myself be open with you.”

She (25F) met me (28M), after she just started seeing her eventual AP. She hit off with him on their first date, a couple days before she hit it off with me when we unexpectedly met at an event, which we turned into our first date. So she dated and texted both of us daily for the first three weeks of our “talking stage.” She had sex with me first, on our third date, which was also my first time having sex, and she knew that, but it felt right that I wanted her to be my first. And I didn’t think she was seeing anyone else but me. She left on a week long trip right after I lost my virginity to her, and she continued texting me and her eventual AP, since she was still emotionally split, especially since she still hadn’t had sex with him yet, only me when she left on her trip, so I’m sure she still had some unresolved sexual curiosity and tension with him (their texts when she was on her trip definitely showed this).

She set up a date with him for the day she got back, instead of with me, and set up a date with me for the day after she got back, telling me “she had plans with her girlfriend,” but she wanted to see me the next day. The day she got back and went on her very much anticipated third date with him, she had sex with him for the first time. Then the next week after this (our third week of talking), we hung out all day every day, and had sex every night multiple times, and got very close very fast. During this third week she kept texting her eventual AP but since he had a kid, and was busy with “work” all the time, he never saw her again after their third date where they had sex for the first time, despite her efforts to see him again during this third week of talking to both of us.

Then at the end of the third week of talking to both of us daily, and having only gone on 3 dates with him, and probably 10 with me. He left on a trip to Europe that he told her about, and when he left, he completely stopped texting and calling her out of nowhere with no explanation. She thought he just wasn’t interested anymore or wasn’t looking for anything serious. 3 days into his silence she asked me to be exclusive because we were having sex every day for the last two weeks, and didn’t want to keep seeing me every day and every night, if this was just, “casual.” So I asked if she wanted to be exclusive, and she did, and we promised eachother we wouldn’t talk or see anybody else.

A week into exclusivity, and continuing to spend every day and night together for almost 3 straight weeks, he texted her late at night saying “aaaand we’re back.” On the one night I wasn’t with her because I worked a night shift. She immediately started texting him, teased him sexually, and asked him to pick her up, but he was jet lagged so he said he’d love to see her another night. The day prior to this, her and I bought flights to our first trip together to Oregon and Washington. The following 10 days leading up to our trip, after he resurfaced, she and him went back and forth trying to see each other again, but because she was either with me when he would try to see her, or he was busy with work or his baby when she would try during my night shift days, they never found a time that worked for both of them, until after our trip, where I fell in love with her, and where she asked me to be her boyfriend.

2 days after the trip (and 9 days into being officially boyfriend and girlfriend, and 3 weeks since we became “exclusive,”) she met up at the bar they had their first date, went back to his house after drinks, and stayed the night, having sex at night as well as in the morning, when I was out of town for a concert. The next day when I was coming home late late that night, he asked her to come over to his house again to watch a movie, but she had plans to pick me up at 12am from the airport. She ended up cancelling on me, but told me she wanted to see me when I got home which would be like 1am. And then she texted him saying she might be able to go over and watch a movie with him but would let him know later. Then at 9pm, she texted him saying she was super tired and was “gonna call it a night :(.” So she at least stayed strong that night.

Then next 4 days we continued