I can’t fucking stand my delusional boyfriend and I can’t stand living without him

It never stops. The accusations. The delusions. The manipulation. The insults. And my dumbass loves him. You fucking did it Anthony. I love you and I hate you. I’m worn down into nothing. No money, no job, no family relationships, no hope, and now no life. You took everything from me. You should’ve just fucked me and spit in my face and left it at that instead of destroying me slowly from the inside out. I’ve been assaulted, abused, attempted before, had nothing, and I’ve never been nearly as miserable as I am now. My whole life has revolved around a delusional manipulative man who has burned all of his bridges and made himself homeless. And I’m still gonna die loving him. Because I’m even dumber than he is. Every time I said I would die for you, I meant it. Im not gonna be a pussy or fail anymore. I’m doing this shit no matter how painful it is. I’m sorry. Bye.