My (24m) girlfriend (26f) got all her body count in a year and I can’t stop thinking about it

Help with obsessive thinking

So I’ve been in a situationship with this girl for about 7 months now. We started as something completely casual — we’re in the same master’s program, same friend group, and honestly neither of us was looking for anything serious. But somewhere along the way it escalated. We said I love you. She’s basically living at my place. And now I want to make things official.
The problem is me, I think. Or maybe it’s compatibility. I’m not sure.
Before me, she had a period of about 8 months where she was with 6 different people (she had a long relationship before that and the last 2 were a threesome). She’s told me the context — she had just moved to a new country, came out of something difficult, and the last experience was genuinely traumatic for her. After that she didn’t want to be close to anyone for over a year. Then came me.
I know the context. I understand it rationally. But my values are more conservative and I can’t fully turn off how it makes me feel. And I hate that about myself because she’s been nothing but honest with me.
The thing is — she’s not doing anything wrong. She’s warm, she’s honest, she’s chosen to be with me. When I’m with her everything feels right. It’s when I’m alone that my brain goes to dark places.
We haven’t had the full conversation yet about expectations and what we want. I want to have it. I want to make this work. But I’m scared that my values and her history are fundamentally incompatible — and I don’t want to hurt her by committing to something I can’t fully get over.
Am I being judgmental? Is this a me problem or a compatibility problem? Has anyone been in a similar situation and actually made it work?
TL;DR: Want to make things official with a girl I genuinely love but struggling with her past and some of her behaviors due to my more conservative values. Not sure if this is something I can get over or a fundamental incompatibility.

Posted May 8, 2026, 3:43 PM UTC

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