A lost dream

Hello. I am an incoming 1st year college. I just want to vent out here, and hear your thoughts.

Just last month, me and my boyfriend took a CET at our local state university. We had high high hopes for each other. I had really high hopes for myself too dahil hindi lang ito para saakin, para din sa family ko. We all know how much of a relief it would be to be enrolled sa isang state u.

We studied together, took review classes together, prayed together. All we were asking is for both of us to pass. And every night, I pray dahil hindi ko alam how I would handle the situtation if one of us fails. Also, same course yung gusto namin.

Now this course is only very limited to few people. So grabe yung competition. Then came the day of results. And guess what? He passed, I failed.

Worst day of my life. I didn't know how to react. Dreamnt of it for 4 years. And it just faded like nothing.

I think it's been more than 2 weeks. He's now studying for the aptitude test. But I'm here still grieving for the dream I lost. It's honestly so depressing. Everytime he mentions how he's gonna study, how he's gonna have to pass the reqs, It brings an ache to my heart. Diko talaga alam paano makakaalis sa sitwasyon na to.

As much as I want to be supportive towards him, mas nangingibabaw talaga na gusto ko na lang manahimik dahil ramdam ko pa rin yung sakit.