AITA for breaking down during an important event?
I (6NB, oak wood, waxed finish) have worked for 6 years as a dining chair for the Robertson family. I have provided dutiful, round the clock service to Mr and Mrs Robertson and their twins, and any guests and family that come around.
Yesterday, they were hosting a small dinner to celebrate Mrs Robertson's pregnancy (twins again). One of the guests was Mrs Robertson's sister-in-law. This sister-in-law is rather portly, shall we say, and she chose me as her ailing servant of the evening. Whenever she chooses me, I can feel my legs and screws straining underneath her - but this is the life I have chosen, so I am still happy to serve her.
It happened halfway through the dinner, when she reached out for a third serving of the roast sirloin. After years of wear, I could not handle the extra strain placed on my front half, and I collapsed below her.
She was awfully embarrassed and immediately stood to attention, apologising profusely. Admist shouts of 'oh my god I can't fucking take you anywhere' and 'you fatty mcfatfuck', I sat humiliated in my own heap of rubble. I could not, sadly, reassemble myself to help the evening continue gracefully. I felt so deeply apologetic to my rotund friend, who was now being escorted out the door with cries of 'VENMO ME $40 FOR A NEW CHAIR TONIGHT OR ELSE'.
I should hope they simply spoke out of anger, and are instead taking me to a repair shop tomorrow instead of replacing me. But if they are and this is my last day on Earth, I would like to know, dear reader... was I the asshole? Is there anything I could have done better?
Posted May 10, 2026, 2:14 PM UTC