Ativan Safety?

F24, 5’2 120lb

Hi! I’m prescribed lorazepam 1-2mg as needed for panic disorder and I’m trying to understand the actual risks or dangers of long term PRN use, because I see so much conflicting information from Reddit and online in general. I always have to stress about whether to take it or not, sometimes for hours before I actually take it. Which I believe adds a lot of unecessary suffering I wouldn’t have to deal with if I felt more knowledgeable about benzodiazepines.

I know daily benzo use can cause dependence and withdrawal issues, but is that just as true with PRN use over a long period of time? Like using it occasionally during stressful periods, or a few times in one week, and then not again for a while (at LEAST a week)?

Can that still realistically lead to physical dependence, withdrawal, seizure risk, etc? Or are those risks mostly associated with consistent daily or near daily use?

Also, I was wondering if tolerance develops from every single use no matter how spaced apart the doses are, or if tolerance is more related to frequent continuous use patterns.

I’m extremely anxious about this medication, but it has been working for me for my panic disorder (I also take Pregablin and Wellbutrin). I use it very spaced out, but sometimes more frequently during a rough patch. My medications, including my intermittent lorazapam, have improved my quality of life so much over the past year. But I’m trying to better understand the general risk profile because it makes me very, very anxious.

Thank you so much for any insight !