Married loves the idea of being corrupted

As a married man, idk how to describe it. The lust and desire seems to be consuming me more and more than I thought it would. Being super religious and doing something against is just a rush. I love the fact that a women wants me to desire her more than the wife. Wants me to think about her when I’m with the family. I should be a good family man but when she wants to distract me just gives it a whole different rush. Even now I am thinking about just even sexting when I should be paying attention to the kids, even now my head thinks about what it would be if I was deep inside a women when I shouldn’t be. Hell even maybe just filling her with my married cum. Ughh it just gets me going. I just need it