It feels odd to not want to have a Happy Mother's Day like a normal person because of my bad family dynamic

I genuinely don't want to spread hatred, but it feels so out of sync to not participate in the festivity and the warmness of Mother's Day when I have had a terrible relationship with my parents. I do appreciate all that was done for me via financial support and other help, but like overall I have had a bad experience. I think other people probably think I'm ungrateful for not visually celebrating Mother's Day. Does anyone else feel the same?