So there's this [*Hirudo medicinalis*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hirudo_medicinalis) (a european medicinal leech) that is leeching off of my very life essence- his first host just plucked him off. Throughout my 9 months being parasitized by him he has been dismissive of my bodies immune system but expects me to cater to his needs. He attached to my jugular vein and sucks up about 25ml of blood an hour he dug his teeth in one time just because I tried to pull him off. I’m jobless but still produce 100% of the nutrients we both share. I’ve been trying to just remove him till he crawls out of the bedside trashcan and relatches cuz I’m exhausted by that point.

Well a few years back I was infected with a [*Schistosoma haematobium*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schistosoma_haematobium) (an Egyptian urinary blood fluke) that was taking up residence in my urinary tract. This Egyptian flatworm was the biggest of it's genus ever discovered. It was purely pain. I'd just sit there and let out screams ( which broke any window)… it was perfect for me to have a friend. Well, anyways, I also have a third, non-Egyptian, non-parasitic [guy](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human), and when he found about my parasitic piss hole demon that lives in the Nile River region, he blocked them from my socials. Fast forward to now, I sign up for wats app and a strange name texts me. So I accept and they proceed to tell me that it’s him! The Egyptian urethral fleshcork of my worst, most horrible nightmares. He told me he’s been trying for 3 1/2 years to climb back into me. But I’m still stuck with the new leech who wont hop off my neck. Should I believe that my this horrid Egyptian monstrosity still just wants my blood, or does he want more? Cuz I’m thinking I should try and get rid of my baggage now for this nightmare fuel… thoughts ladies?

Things are getting... complicated