black parents need to do better regarding mental health.

i posted this on the blackgirls subreddit too but recently I had an absolutely horrible week related to something at work with my boss screaming at me in front of everyone. like public humiliation/shame spiral/panic attack level horrible. i’ve barely been eating right, been doomscrolling, crying, dissociating, stomach messed up, whole nervous system fried.

and somehow the conversation with my black parents STILL became:
“why do you need therapy?”
“just talk to us”
“stop venting”
“move on”

but when i DO talk to them i get:
“maybe your boss was right”
“you only have a few days left, let it go”
etc.

like ??? do y’all not see the contradiction 😭 if every time i express emotions i feel dismissed or criticized then YES i am going to therapy because where else am i supposed to process this stuff??

what frustrates me is therapy didn’t come out of nowhere either. i was self harming in middle school, missed like 90 days of high school, was deeply depressed for years, literally spent nights on crisis lines, etc. but somehow the concern NOW is “i don’t want someone telling my kid what to do.”

i know some of this is generational/cultural and i don’t think my parents are evil people. but sometimes it feels like a lot of black families only feel comfortable with mental health conversations if you’re still functioning, smiling, productive, and not “too emotional.”

these are the same fuckers who would go “she seemed so happy” if i offed myself i swear.