Parents Living with Us Advice

My parents currently live with us. To provide some context, my parents moved in withnus when my first daughter was born who is now 13yo. Inhave 2 daughters, 11 and 13. The plan was to live with us for a bit to help with the babies and then they would eventually buy their own house. Well that never happened. When we bought our first house, instead of buying a house that accommodated my own family and have a mortgage that me and my wife could afford on our own, we needed to buy a bigger house to also accommodate my parents. Fast forward to now.....my mom is old school and she has her ways. She gets really annoyed when my kids make a mess, who almost always cleans up after themselves. They are kids.and kids will be kids. They understand how grandma is so they always clean up but sometimes grandma will get mad when she sees a "mess". Sometime she can be a witch my my girls with what she says and maybe she doesn how hurtful she is when she says things. She cleans the house every single day, its her routine. Whats frustrating is she goes into our room to clean even though we neve ask her to. Sometimes we'll find stuff missing or misplaced and my girls tell us grandma was in our room again. We told her she dosesnt need to be in our room and she got upset about it....lol. I was like WTH. One of our bedrooms they turned into a guest room without discussing it. And because of that, my girls have to share a room. So last night, me and my wife went on a date night and one of my daughters was in the living room. She had a blanket laid out and was playing with stuff and grandma sees that and started getting upset saying she needed to clean up now and she was always making a mess and under her breathe as she was walking away, my daughter said she said "this is why I want my own house". To add some more.context, my dad is chill and my girls love him.and he loves them and will drop anything to attend to their needs, its just my mom.

So back to what she said, that just stuck with me. My wife understands how she is and is annoyed at times but at the same she knows its my parents. Sometimes I feel like arguments that me and my wife have stem from something my mom did or said. My parents have done so much to help with my kids and do appreciate them for that.

Any advice or suggestions on how to live.with this going forward? Am I being selfish about this?