How do you stop idealizing someone you had intense chemistry with but no real relationship?

20F and I need actual advice because this has been messing with me mentally for way too long.

There’s this guy I was involved with on and off. We hooked up in May 2024 and again a few times between March-April 2025. We never officially dated, barely talked consistently, and realistically I know he probably doesn’t care about me like that. We reconnected on Facebook in February 2026 but he mostly just wanted to hook up again.

The problem is I STILL think about him constantly even though logically I know the situation wasn’t good for me. My family doesn’t even like him and thinks he’s a bum, so it’s not like this was some perfect relationship everyone supported either.

What confuses me is I’ve met genuinely sweet guys since then. I’m even talking to a really nice guy right now. But I still don’t feel the same chemistry/intensity I felt with this one guy. Not even necessarily because of how he treated me, more the attraction and vibe felt different.

I’ve tried journaling, therapy, distracting myself, etc. I genuinely thought I moved on and then suddenly this week all the feelings came back again.

How do you stop romanticizing someone when the actual situation wasn’t even that good? And how do you stop comparing every new person to that one intense connection?