I feel like I’m loosing my mind

I’m 48, ex- evangelical, recently opened an online witchy shop. Prior to my opening, I announced on Facebook (family and old friends) that I’m a witch. Crickets from everyone except my witchy friends. It’s something that means a lot to me (overcoming people pleasing and reclaiming my voice). I didn’t want to hide it and didn’t want to be ashamed of my newly formed practice.

Since then, I feel like I have lost my ever loving mind!

I find so much beauty in the practice of witchcraft. I met a lovely group of friends here- all witches and seeing their practice that is a blend of facing your shadows, being in community, helping others, healing your shit and honoring intention, working with the earth’s natural cycles and energetic imprint of all that’s around us- it felt like home. I see so many beautiful connecting threads between witchcraft and mindfulness. In so many ways, witchcraft is mindfulness.

I have a mindfulness background. I know the things to do to regulate. Yet, I just am not regulating. Everything feels so painful- almost all of the time, and in ways that don’t feel like my normal bouts of depression and anxiety at all, you know? I also find myself ruminating on past bad decisions - unfortunately it’s a lot and was over a period of years.

A lot of painful circumstances are happening and I’m also at an impasse with what I want to do in life - almost feeling like it’s too late bc of my health. I’m not a highly functioning person.

Again, not sure if this resonates with anyone else. Maybe someone else has experienced this and is on the other side. Thanks for reading.