Calling Out after Bedtime

Our almost-4yo has always been low sleep needs, and is currently stuck in the preschool trap where she’ll nap at school (mandatory) and then can’t get to sleep till 10 pm or later. Currently lights go out at 8:30 and I stay with her a bit and am out of her room around 9.
That structure has worked for us off and on, but for the past several weeks she’s been calling out pitifully for mom (me) around 9:45 or so, as she starts to get sleepy. She’ll repeat “I need mama” and say she’s lonely, and get increasingly agitated when I don’t come.
My partner wants me to just ignore her and treat it like extinction sleep training; he thinks my responding to her will keep her from being able to go to sleep without me in the long term. I on the other hand am concerned about any psychological effects it might have for her to keep asking for a parent and expressing that she needs them, only to be ignored. I also grew up in a very unsupportive home with not-great parents, so it’s hard to see past that baggage to what is really best for her.
I would especially love if anyone can point me to theory- or science-based literature on the effects either way…but also happy to hear anecdotes and advice from anyone who’s been in the same boat.