I'm 23 F. Still 12 th passout

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Dropped 5 years for neet. No partial drop no nothing. Now I don't think that I'll crack neet this year also. I was at fault for all this time, not fully but I can't put blame on anyone for my emotions. But I don't know what to do now. I have been in my home for those 5 years. Never went on any trip where I can be at peace. My parents always make their way to ruin my peace. Can't blame them, there is "too much love" between them. Now please suggest to me what I should do. I know that I have potential but I don't think that does count now. I'm frustrated, I want to run away from this house. Many time my mind crossed through some su\*c\*dal thoughts. But I guess I'm weak also. I can't take this much step by myself. If anyone does something then illbe happy.