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Should I tell my other friend group about our narcissistic friend?

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Problem/Goal: Please don't share this story on other platforms. I (27F) have two friend groups that are interconnected with each other. The first friend group has cut off one person kasi she's (27F) changed and has narcissistic tendencies. Problem is that girl is also part of the second friend group. Should I tell the second friend group about her?

Context: I'm going to be assigning aliases para di magulo, hahaha. So apat kami sa first friend group originally, with Ann, Bianca, and Cheska; we became close nung pandemic and we'd always chat everyday with each other sa gc.

Sa second friend group naman, 6 kami and kasama ako sa grupo along with Ann and Cheska; basically this group was my college barkada. We still chat sometimes sa Messenger, pero not that frequent na since we have different lives after college.

All three of us sa first friend group had a falling out with Cheska kasi she was becoming hostile towards the group and na-observe ko na may narcissistic tendencies siya when we have conflicts (i.e. playing the victim, gaslighting, lying para magmukhang kami yung masama when it's actually her). Never siya nag-sorry samin for all the mean things she said and did and told us na wala siyang kasalanan. Each of us contacted her months after to reconcile sana, but she kept insisting na di na raw to maaayos.

Cheska left the second group's gc, and Ann and I never really cleared the air for the girls kasi (1)we were still mad and grieving sa friendship breakup, (2) We didn't think it was our story to tell to the group without Cheska around to tell her side of the story din, and (3) Yung away namin is just between the four of us and it sounds evil to paint Cheska the bad guy (even if she was for the most part) and tell them to unfriend her na rin.

Ann still had strong connections with the second friend group (coz I was dealing with some personal stuff and didn't bother much to talk) and nasabi niya sakin na Cheska has been talking to one of the girls sa second friend group (let's call her Sam) and telling Sam na gusto niya pa pala magbati kaming magbabarkada but she doesn't have the courage to do so. Ann told Sam na same thoughts naman kami, but if she truly wants to make up, she has to put down her pride, apologize, and be sincere in reconciling talaga. So we were hopeful na magkabalikan kami ulit kasi we miss her pa rin kahit na naging a-hole siya samin.

Years passed, and Ann revealed to Bianca and me na nag-usap pala sila ni Cheska in person one last time recently. And nakakalungkot mga pinagsasabi ni Cheska. She told Ann na kasalanan ni Bianca kung bakit nagkawatak-watak kami and dahil sa pera (which is a lie kasi siya lagi gumagawa ng gulo saming apat when we were still together, and Cheska was willing to sabotage her friendship with Bianca dahil lang sa pera, mind you), told her na never ako nag-approach sa kanya to make up (also a lie and I have screenshots ng convo namin to prove it), and a lot of bs that made our blood boil.

What shocked everyone was that wala palang plans si Cheska to reconcile with us and that she's better off without us. Dinamay pa yung second friend group namin and condescendingly said na college friends *lang* naman sila.

Istg, this story has so many details, pero I can't tell it all at baka ma-doxx pa ako.

Previous Attempts: None. I'm just conflicted kung tama ba na ikuwento itong side namin sa story sa second friend group since we're all meeting up by the end of the year as a reunion (except Cheska). Ang takot ko lang kasi is that baka maisipan ni Cheska na pinagchichismisan namin siya sa ibang tao na problema lang naming apat at dinadamay ang ibang tao (which was a common argument between her and her ex noon, kaya namin naisip). I probably would not have thought of this if di niya dinamay ang second friend group namin when she and Ann met in person, and I feel the need to tell our story to them as a PSA na rin kasi (1) narcissistic people tend to twist the story and pretend to be nice, as I've learned the hard way, and (2) it sounds so disrespectful na sabihing college friends *lang* sila and they demand to know about it. Pero I also want to think na malalaki na kami (27-29 y/o) and we could just move on with our lives and let karma do its thing nalang. Ann and I don't want to be haters and tell the group na "wag niyo na siyang kaibiganin kasi ang sama niyang tao" and really goes against our values, pero ayoko rin na masaktan second friend group namin sa kagaguhan ni Cheska in the future, if it happens (though I have no knowledge as to how close Cheska is to them).

Posted May 12, 2026, 8:15 AM UTC

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