How to stop covert avoidance?

I've been on and off agoraphobic (currently at its worst) for about 7 years now. The times that I have been able to go out I uncontrollably zone out, and even that isnt enough to stop panic attacks a lot of the time.

Ive always been anxious. As a kid I had selective mutism, im not sure that it ever fully went away. Ive always zoned out around people. I dont have a desire to talk I prefer the awkward silence to saying anything. I think social situations are actually less awkward to me than it is to the other person because of how zoned out I am.

Ive been on a lot of different antidepressants and i've given up on them because they only give me stomach issues which makes me 100x more anxious because that is my biggest fear. That is the main thing that triggered my agoraphobia. I cant leave the house without feeling sick.

I cant be fully present in the moment, even when im alone. I feel so exhausted all the time the only thing I enjoy is sleeping. Ive tried exposure therapy but it has only reinforced my isolation. I really want to get better even if I keep avoiding people I just want to stop being anxious.