Just feeling low and demotivated due to poor health

I have had my large intestine removed, now facing having my thyroid removed, trouble conceiving. im just facing health issues one after another, all major life changing surgeries. I fee like I can’t be bothered with praying, I do it but my mind doesnt focus. I do believe in Allah but Ive just never felt so low iman before. Im just not interested in it. my heart is hard. I know we shouldn’t feel like why me, but I feel like Allah is just doing too much. I feel like these health issues are the result of my own actions and distance from faith and yet I still can’t make myself change and get closer to Allah. I’m just so tired of it all.