newly diagnosed depression

hi! im newly diagnosed with depression. I sought help because I’m a healthcare worker and don’t want to compromise patient safety.

I had suicidal ideations and actually acted on it. I sought help and was officially diagnosed with depression. I’m on medications now and I really find it helpful, particularly because when I take it at night = knock out.

Anyway, I also am very lost at how to navigate my emotions because I feel like with my diagnosis I’m not allowed to feel anything other than sadness/ despair ALL THE TIME. Like I need to be sad all the time because if I feel the slightest bit of happiness then “i’m not depressed enough” I haven’t spoken to my therapist about this but yeahhhh life’s tough lately.

To people with depression how are you actually managing this feeling? If you’re also going through the same thing?