mom using christianity against me

~4 months ago, i moved out of home again because i had realized i was trans and started HRT because i was dying from anorexia and i had figured out that dysphoria had always been the reason. I had no money saved due to being unable to work, so i stayed with my best friend in the city so i could work and heal, but i think testosterone is worsening my schizophrenia, and my chronic pain wouldnt improve because i have a hard time eating enough on my own still. so i had to give up and move back home. i said to my partner and friends that i could deal with being called she her and my deadname because whatever, im just trying to survive in the US right now. She forced me out to her before i moved out, and said she could tell from the first week i was on it (i think im intersex so my changes have been pretty dramatic, more than anticipated so i thought i could be sneaky about it longer) my mom keeps telling me that they still love me but she cant accept this, or call me he/him, she said the most she can do is not use a name for me at all. i never expected acceptance, my father has been saying homophobic/racist/transphobic shit for as long as i can remember, and mother never said anything besides agreeing or also venting her frustrations with the “damage these lgbtq people have done”. she says she hopes the Lord can help me, keeps telling me that all my discomfort is just worldly and i need to give it up to the lord, and she prays that ill align with the life god gave me (de transition) ive been trying so hard to ignore this because honestly, i used to be transphobic too because of them in middle school, and theyve always labeled me as super dramatic (i have adhd) so i just feel like i wont ever deserve that respect. she said that calling me he/him would make her too uncomfortable, so her comfort outranks mine. i have to live here until im financially secure which im terrified wont be before they move to fucking alabama in a yearish. which i dont think is a good place for trans people right now. im just sad that my parents will always see me as an ugly girlfailure