Need Advice Please

Alright yall. This is my first post on Reddit but I really want to hear all the opinions. I am so torn and sad and really truly disappointed. We were together 1.5 years. The first 6 months were incredible. I felt chosen, seen, sought after. He brought me flowers unexpectedly, planned the dates, and showed up in all the ways I ever wanted. I trained his dog, he was super involved with my family and me with his. We spent every weekend together, went on trips, and it really seemed like there was a real future for us. He started experiencing some major health issues that later would lead to panic attacks on his end frequently throughout the relationship. Also episodes where he would sleep for hours during the day time. Things just slowly started to change from here. He wasn’t up front with communication on these issues, and they affected me a ton. For example we’d have a date planned and he would leave me waiting and wondering for hours only for me to find out later he was having a panic attack. Or I would hear from him later that he was asleep. I had to go to his apartment multiple times to wake him up so we could follow through on plans. Towards the end it kept being the same conversations from me. Asking for more consistent communication and effort. Asking for more consist text updates throughout the day, him to post me on instagram, be more vulnerable about what was going on, and just show more intentional effort that I was being prioritized like he did at the beginning. I was there for him as much as he would let me be. The ending was brutal. I was with his family just days before. Everything seemed so fine. He had a panic attack during the day we were both supposed to be at a friends birthday party. I immediately called him when he told me to make sure he was okay. He seemed fine. Said he would shower to calm down and see me later at his mom’s house and when I got there he seemed completely fine too. Then he goes distant the next day when we were supposed to have plans and I explain again that communication is important to me in the relationship. He ignores my text so I call and he goes off on me. Saying I wasn’t there for him at all during the panic attack. I’m completely confused because I called as soon as he told me and tried to talk with him one on one at his moms when we had a moment alone. Few days later he after being completely distant and my anxiety has been building. He comes over to my house and says he doesn’t have the capacity for this relationship and he’s struggling more than he’s led me on to believe. We break up. But the worst part is he removes me from every single social and is completely a ghost. Like I don’t exist at all to him anymore. I’ve been so in shock. I mean clearly he didn’t have the capacity in the relationship done he wasn’t showing up for me but to just end things like this? So cold? He was at my house maybe for 15 minutes. I completely understand having health issues but why would you run from the one person who cares or is trying to be there for you? Who cares. Who has been riding it out this whole time praying for things to get better. He’s trying to handle things on his own is what he says. That he needs to be alone to figure this out. I understand that but did I have to be cut out completely? And so suddenly. I’ve completely gone silent. I haven’t reached out. I have self respect because I truly gave him everything and showed up the best I could. I shrunk my needs so many times to let him work through his issues and try and let him be the man I saw before. I was so anxious throughout the relationship because he was so inconsistent. I love him deeply still. He was my best friend. It’s hard to see him suffering but even more painful that he just walked away way. He posted from a concert just days after the breakup that we were supposed to go to together. Looking like he was having a great time. But he “never posts” and that’s why he couldn’t ever post me? I truly don’t believe there’s another woman or cheating involved. His panic attacks were real and I had his location and phone password. I’m just at a loss of words. I showed up for him as much as he would let me. I told him I’d do anything for him. That we always repair things together. I tried to help him. I know I deserved better throughout the relationship but I am so sad he couldn’t meet me where I was at and give me that. It’s hard not to hold onto hope that he’ll figure this out and come back but the pain of him just completely being cold and walking out my door says a lot. I feel like I never fully knew him. Any advice is welcome. I really don’t think I should ever be the one to reach out at this point. I am just so sad that he’s just gone so fast. I have never loved anyone as much as I loved him.