Can't bring myself to shower properly for the life of me

Please help I don't know what's wrong with me. Showering always feels like a monumental task. This is so embarrassing but when I get into the shower all I have the mental energy for is to wash myself with water and only the most important few parts with soap. I so badly wish I could just use soap on my whole body but I just can't. I wish I could take pride in my body but like this I can't. I dont know why I cant take care of myself properly. It's such a basic task. I don't know how to overcome this obstacle. It's just showering. Please any advice would be appreciated.