Sensitive sleeper/highly alert

I was sent to this subreddit because most other groups just say “your son is sleeping too much,” which couldn’t be further from the truth.

I’m looking for advice from parents of highly sensitive / high sleep-needs toddlers because I genuinely feel like I’m losing my mind.

My son is 27 months old and has basically struggled with sleep his entire life. He is extremely verbal/advanced for his age, very connected, very active, and honestly an amazing kid during the day — but sleep has been relentless.

This is not a case of “bad routines” or inconsistent parenting. Since birth I’ve:
prioritized sleep
tracked wake windows
followed routines consistently
optimized his room/environment
watched overtired cues closely
kept bedtime early
addressed congestion/airway issues
tried attachment-based approaches
tried more structured approaches
Nothing gives lasting improvement.

His biggest issue is that he seems completely unable to stay asleep or transition between sleep cycles smoothly. He wakes and IMMEDIATELY sits upright fully alert, even while visibly exhausted. He will ask for water/snacks/outside/books even when he’s clearly beyond tired. If we don’t intervene, he often just sits there awake instead of laying back down.

Current pattern:
bedtime usually around 7–7:30
wakes around 6–6:30 no matter what
multiple night wakes where he sits up and calls for us
often only goes back to sleep if we physically lay him back down (“horizontal reset”)
daycare naps are inconsistent and stimulation there makes everything worse
if overtired, he becomes absolutely dysregulated (crying, throwing things, wired behaviour, head banging, etc.)

What’s maddening is that he is VERY obviously high sleep-needs. When he occasionally gets more sleep, he’s calmer, happier, more regulated, and bedtime goes much smoother. But he just seems incapable of maintaining sleep consistently.
He is also incredibly sensory/mentally alert. He has literally stayed awake because he found a shirt tag to play with. If he partially wakes, his brain immediately looks for stimulation.

I’m pregnant and honestly terrified because I haven’t slept properly in over 2 years and I feel like nobody understands how extreme this has been. Most people say “all toddlers wake” but this feels beyond typical toddler sleep issues at this point.

Has anyone had a child like this who eventually matured out of it? Did anything actually help? Pediatric sleep specialist? OT? Time? I genuinely don’t know what I’m dealing with anymore. Thank you so much!