Two dead bedrooms in one night.

As someone who’s been in a DB for a good while, I can’t believe I’m venting about actually being asked for sex but I just need to get it off my chest because I’m mildly flabbergasted at the current situation.

My wife (33/LLF) and I (33/HLM) are going away for a long weekend. It’s a long drive so we decided to drive halfway last night, stop off and carry on driving today. Out of nowhere on the drive, she asked if I’d packed condoms. I said "No" because I was expecting a long weekend of no sex as always but then I was told I should have because she had "plans". No build-up, no tension - I was just expected to randomly hit the horny button because our geographical location was changing for a few days.

I swerved the question but then….we got a call to say my grandfather had suddenly died.

We took a detour to his home and my wife dropped me off to be with my family as the eldest grandchild. I didn’t mind that she didn’t stay; some people might wonder why but I needed to focus and I think she got that. So - for hours I’m in the house, looking at his body, comforting crying family, listening to police take statements, watching the coroner take the body away etc. I didn't get back to where my wife and I are staying until past midnight.

Then this morning, she says "I'm going to the pharmacy, shall I get condoms?" and I'm thinking…you can't be serious…

I didn’t say anything at the time so, later she texts again asking if she should get condoms and what size. I was working but eventually texted back and said I'm not in the frame of mind to even be thinking about that to which she replied that she was “just checking”.

We’ll have a serious sit down later to talk through but I genuinely can't believe that the morning after my grandfather’s death, and the night I've had, she would even think that's an appropriate question to ask.

Hey, I don’t want a DB and I’ve commented before that she puts lots of barriers up but I feel really angry and frankly shocked that this is the precise moment she thinks that ‘fixing’ it is a priority.