How do I ask someone I barely know if they’re being abused?

There’s this married couple (both women in their mid 20s) I’ve only met a few times. They’re friends of a close friend of mine. I think one of them is being abused by the other. I’ll refer to them as A (abuser) and V (victim) for clarity.

I’ve been in an abusive relationship myself, and I think I’ve become pretty good at spotting the signs but people around me don’t see the same problems I do. I also am still working on my own trauma and therefore this situation and knowing how to handle it is extra difficult.

Basically, every time I’ve met these people there’s been at least one snarky comment from A towards her wife. She basically acts like those boomer couples who hate each other and gets annoyed at everything the other person says. The first time I didn’t think much of it other than the relation being kinda toxic. However, my friend was celebrating her birthday in a restaurant and this couple was there. When gifts were being opened, V said something about the gift before my friend had the chance to open it. She said something along the lines of “you might know what this is” or something like that, hinting at what the gift was. Her wife then blew up at her screaming in the middle of the restaurant “can you shut the fuck up?“. I jumped, and so did V. She looked mortified. I think everyone was uncomfortable, but no one said anything. I kinda wish I had the guts to say something then and there, but I was really anxious being around a bunch of people I barely knew.

I asked my close friend about this and she basically just said ”yeah they’re just like that, but they’re really attached to each other so I doubt she’ll ever leave” and like played the whole thing off as not that serious. I know it’s hard for people who haven’t gone through something like that to see the red flags but I’m really worried.

I feel awful about not having done anything. I just don’t know how to go about it. I’ve never met V without A being present, and never talked to her one on one. I want her to know that she doesn’t deserve to be screamed at, but I don’t know how to communicate that without possibly putting her in danger if it’s worse behind closed doors (which I’m aware it often is).

Every time I’ve met V she has seemed to pay extra attention to me, always included me in conversations, payed close attention when I talk, stuff like that. She just seems super sweet. My friend told me that prior to the birthday she told her friends to be extra kind to me as I have been through a lot, and so I think this is why V pays extra attention. It means a lot to me, and the least I can do is tell her that I’m here if she ever needs to talk. I just don’t know how to approach her in a safe way