Relationship advice

I feel like years of rejection in my relationship has destroyed my confidence and I don’t know what to do anymore

Me (24M) and my girlfriend (22F) have been together for 3 years, and our sex life has basically always consisted of me initiating everything and putting in all the effort. She almost never initiates, and I get rejected constantly. We’ve had dozens of conversations about it over the years, and every time I try to explain how much it’s affecting me mentally, it somehow turns into my fault or I end up feeling guilty for even bringing it up.

At this point it’s not even just about sex anymore. It’s genuinely destroyed my confidence and the way I look at myself. I feel ugly, unwanted, undesirable, and honestly just emotionally drained. The last couple nights were more excuses again, and today I just feel completely finished with the situation.

I love her and I don’t want to break up, but I’m starting to resent her because I feel emotionally neglected and unheard. I don’t even want to bring the topic up anymore because I already know how the conversation goes and I can’t keep handling the rejection and blame.

I know relationships aren’t only about sex, but I also don’t think it’s normal to feel unwanted by your partner for years straight and have your self-esteem destroyed because of it.

Has anyone been in a relationship like this before? Did it get better? How do you tell the difference between something fixable and just fundamental incompatibility?