Toxic dependency

It all started sometime before my mom died. It was the last time I got to stay over at his house and he looked angry for some reason that I still don't know. When his dad died I let him stay over but After my mom died he didn't do the same for me. My sister and her husband moved in with us and it was constant drama and domestic abuse, I clung onto his friendship because he was the only company I had that I could really talk to and laugh about things with to escape from that insanity. At my congregation they preach about good friendships over bad ones but nobody stepped up and still hasn't to actually be a good friend no matter how much I've tried and I've run out of any material to establish something beyond a simple greeting that's met with robotic responses, that's another reason I still cling onto my relationship with my best friend. He's bitter petty abd controlling, he wants to act like he has the main moral sense out of anyone but if you call him out on his toxic behavior it's just silence abd ghosting like he's been doing recently. At one point I don't know what I said or did and instead of talking about it with me so I could fix it he'd just ghost me, so I'd buy him a orenejust to be able to see him because his company was thr only thing that could get me through the week dealing with the bs at home. I didn't want to argue with him because at one point he had my headphones and I wanted them back, he lives less than 5 minutes from my house and I complained about it because I wanted them for work but he gave me a dumb excuse for making me wait without telling me when he'll bring them back, I let him get away with it because he's the only close company I have so I lied and acted like he was in the right. From then on I heavily censored myself and blindly agreed with anything with him unless it was about very light topics because he has to take major offense about who knows what since I'm not a mind reader.he never paid me back for stuff he said he was going to and I paid to get his car fixed once and he asked he could pay me back and all I asked in return was to stay over again and he lied saying he'd do that. At one point things got smoother and I felt comfortable to tell him about the problems at home and he said he'd let me move in but then completely flaked on me after i told him I was being threatened physically at home.

My sister and her husband fortunately moved out and I asked my best friend I'd he could come over more often so it wouldn't feel lonely here for my dad, we even made plans to spend new years together. But he went back on his word again and this time it was because I had gone to his house to drop off a feast of leftovers from work for his family and didn't greet him which made his mom chew him out which I'd something I didn't mean to happen because I didn't think he was home at all. But he wouldn't hear it he'd rather belive I did it in purpose. And to twist the knife further he started ghosting me again. We didn't hang out again for a while until his mom sent him to bring me some money to help put around the house after she somehow knew of the problems going on at home after my brother on law amd sister moved out, I never told her anything about it and I didn't ask her for any help, she did it because I've helped her son and her family out alot and I didn't know she was sending sending money because she just told me she was going to send my best friend to drop something off and I told her thanks but he's not going to do it (because he was still ghosting me for a mistake I made with no consideration about the agreement he broke off) I was glad to have his company again but at some point when another friend of ours was going through the same thing I was at home before he just tells me that he let him move in with them, I never asked and I could've lived alright not knowing. But i couldn't tell him because a fucking jerkoff had to come to my job and remind me pf the bs that I thought I was rid of after my brother in law amd sister moved in with us. I thought I made friends with someone at my congregation who was the only other bperson besides my best friend who bothered to spend time with me regularly but he turned put to be a skirt chasing douchebag Andrew tate wannabe so I gave up.

I got my revenge on my best friend by going to japan without him and not taking him with me while he suffers his own problems at home, not to mention he lost his job that I helped him get by fixing his car last time then his car broke down again and I didn't help him at all to fix it meanwhile his moocher friend spent his own money on a new console and games resulting in my best friend needing to buy an old used car that barely a week with it he wrecked the front bumper. I still hung out with him and kept all of my issues from him because of the bullshit at work and my other sister is a bitch so it's that situation that the dad from zootopia 2 said "you could either be right or you could be happy" but I stopped paying for his and his friends food like I used to. I did tell him what my issues were before but he didn't fix anything. Another wedge happened when I went to drop off groceries for his family because I'm friends with them and I wanted to be around people who's company I enjoy to get me through the week, however his friend was there and I told him to please not tell my best friend about this because I didn't want him benefitting from my kindness because he's taken advantage of me. But he didn't keep that secret and now my best friend is ghosting me again. I told him what all my issues were with him and he gives me bullshit reasons why he didn't let me stay over, three different reasons each time. His latest dumb excuse is my odor when he knows I have a hard time smelling things and I couldvyave just taken a bath if that was the issue. And because I was spamming dumb replies to someone on x. Somehow all that makes me a worse friend according to his dumbass logic and HE needs space?