Infidelity advice

Me (35M) and my wife (33F) have 12 years together, 2 of those being married and we have a baby.
I cheated on her. She found out. I feel the guilt and remorse. Pregnancy started with me willing to practice abortion because felt the relationship was unstable and needed some work (I proposed couple counselling) After a deep reflection and discussion, we decided to move on with pregnancy. She deeply wanted to the baby and we didn’t have doubts we loved each other. From that moment, I decided I would do everything to keep our family and the baby. I was providing as much as I could.
2 years later, I cheated. Not the first time, it happened before she was pregnant. I don’t have emotional attachment with the other person. I know I love my wife.
TL;DR Please be brutal with me. Is that something that can be forgiven with time? I know I have to work with forgiving myself, but all I want in my life is to be with a woman like her. I am engaged in therapy now and have the goal to become a more transparent, stable and accountable person - not to mention I will never abandon my child.