how do you feel about the word "deserve" ?

i feel like in many affirmations it goes along the lines of "i deserve mental peace... i deserve xyz" which is good and true. however i saw a video talking about the use of the word deserve and how you don't necessarily have to deserve something to get it, you can just want it. i think for me the word deserve has been tricky for a while and keeps me stuck sometimes. when u have cptsd it's hard to not think that life feels shit, but never have i once thought i deserved the circumstances i am currently in. so to use the words "i deserve xyz" feels like i'm almost saying that i currently deserve what i'm going through. i hope i make sense. i'm looking for thoughts and maybe alternative affirmation starters. thank u