Struggling with playing with myself

Little about me— been on it about little over two years, on and off due being having no private space. recently got my own place and been actively trying to work it out.

I’ve been getting back to my routine that I’ve missed because haven’t able to. One thing that I can’t do is I can’t seem to get back to being able to fit anything down there. I’ve been struggling to do so and can’t seem to get in the right headspace that I used to. I’ve been doing anything I can to feel like the same way it used— and it’s not working. I can’t really do it and it’s always end up me becoming frustrated. I don’t know maybe I’m not patient enough or something i’m not doing right.