One functional eye, retinal detachment surgery 5 days ago, fiancée wants to marry — should we, and should we have kids?
I'm 33, male, Delhi. Born with choroidal coloboma in my left eye — it's prosthetic now. Right eye is the only one I have.
Five days ago I had surgery on it. Superior rhegmatogenous retinal detachment with a complicated cataract. Vitrectomy, cataract removal, silicone oil tamponade. Surgery went well, retina was flat on day 1 OCT. Still in recovery.
My fiancée and I have lived together for 5 years. She knows all of this from the beginning. When this happened I told her to leave. She refused. She signed my discharge papers actually.
She's early career in accounting. Not at a point where she can independently support a family yet. We want kids eventually.
I'm not looking for emotional support or "love is enough" takes. Genuinely asking:
Q1. If you're a retina specialist or ophthalmologist — what's the realistic lifetime risk of total blindness in a one-eyed patient with Type III choroidal coloboma who just had an RD? I'll be monitored every 3 months. Best case, worst case, honest case.
Q2. Should we get married given this situation?
Q3. Should we have kids if we want to?
Q4. How do people in similar situations structure their lives practically — insurance, finances, contingency?
She won't leave. I'm the one with doubts — not about her, about whether it's fair to her.
Posted Jun 3, 2026, 1:15 PM UTC