How early was it when u had your first self harm thoughts?

TW: Childhood suicidal thoughts

since I was 6 years old. At that age, I used to constantly wish that I just wouldn't wake up. Around that same time, I also started routinely imagining women dominating me at that young of an age from 6-13 yo.

Looking back, I went through a lot of bullying and emotional neglect as a kid.

Did anyone else start wanting to disappear at a toddler age, or have specific fantasies like this due to childhood bullying and neglect?

Wanna see if anyone relates