what is wrong with me?

I am trying every day to have a clear mind with peace at the forefront but this shit is gettjng to me. my own boyfriend said "please dont let your mother be the reason u fall apart and cant put urself back together"

So i said no to her, Mind you, i never say no to her. As the youngest, and her only adopted child I feel like i cant say no. i owe her my life! 

 but this time i did! it all started because she made up in her mind that im against her, and she gets sooooo jealous of my boyfriend. she saw me washing his hair (when she was next, mind u, i didnt tell her this because i was going to just DO IT) she started stomping, slamming and belittling me. from that day 3 weeks ago to now, it has been hell. she revoked water access, toilet paper is no longer in the bathroom, i cant use the linen closet so no washcloths for me. she calls my boyfriend a bitch because he doesnt agree with how she treats me, and never allows me to speak how i feel. she will put her fingrrs in her ear just to block me out, then come into my room and continue the argument when she sees fit. just to get me out of character! and yet i still feel bad for defending myself and telling her if she doesnt learn to articulate her feelings she will die alone. i said no because after all of this she comes and asks me to help her, in her TREMBLING voice. and when i said no is when all of the manipulation and control got out of hand. so WHY? why do i let her act this way? and why do i ever feel bad for the outcome ????? whats wrong with me