Am I a jerk to leave an ex-boyfriend who humiliated me?

Hello everyone, friends. It's my first time here and I'm not very good at English, so be patient with me.

My name is Kara, not my real name is from Ukraine, but I now live in America, Texas. I came here with my kid to see a guy I dated for about 5 years since I was in Ukraine and he was in the United States.

It got to the point where he came to me in Ukraine, and we got engaged. We started collecting documents for my move to the United States. Everything was fine for about two weeks after arriving. After that, I noticed him pulling away from me. I thought he was just trying to get used to the fact that he wasn't alone. But after that, I started noticing he was just ignoring me and pretending I'm not here. . I lived with him for a year, and in that year, he just destroyed me and my self-esteem to the core. When we went to the store with him and I took something I wanted, he looked at me like I had killed his dog. After that, when we went to the store with him and I took something, I watched his reaction. If he wasn't happy, it means I shouldn't have taken it. Eventually, while we were driving home, he started blaming me for spending more money than usual. Not only that, when I asked him to give me about $130 for clothes, he would look at me and say I didn't need it. But when I wore some of the clothes I brought from Ukraine, he laughed and said that even his grandmother dressed better. Before that, I thought of myself as a pretty pretty girl, I was 27 at the time, now I'm 29. But he destroyed my self-esteem so much that I was too shy to go out and talk to someone because I thought I was ugly. In the end, a year later, I packed up all the necessary things and just quietly left. He didn't even notice I wasn't home, even though he was at home watching TV when I left. I literally passed by him with a suitcase, and he didn't notice anything. When I left, he noticed I wasn't home around 3am, and when he found my letter. I haven't lived with him for over 2 years, but he still writes and asks me to go back and says he's got it, and I'm currently trying to find a job to raise money for a ticket home. I don't even have money for food, and I have a child who is 9 years old. I can't find a job because I don't have a work permit. Because when I wanted to get a work permit and go work, he told me I needed it. And now I don't know what to do or where to go. Sorry guys, I just needed to get it off my chest since I'm sitting crying because I'm in a foreign country and don't know what to do.