Protecting My Ability to Participate

I feel perpetually responsible for protecting my role in my childs life while operating with incomplete information and unclear expectations. I feel like I have to actively defend my ability to participate rather than simply be able to participate.

When I look at the last several years, I have spent an enormous amount of time and energy contacting teachers, therapists, medical offices, and attorneys, documenting incidents, asking for clarification, and tracking communications, not because I am trying to control everything, but because I am trying to make sure I do not lose sight of what is happening in my childs life and care.

I am not asking for control. I am asking for reliable participation. I want to understand the framework of care, have access to information I am entitled to as a parent, and be able to meaningfully participate in decisions affecting my child without constantly having to pursue information or defend my involvement.

I just needed to say that.